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Life and Times of an itinerant slacker in Sacramento. Thrills, Spills Galore coming soon. Not to mention lots of opinions.

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Monday, June 29, 2009

The Older I Get. . .




... the more I agree with the view expressed in this cartoon.

Thanks to XKCD,A webcomic of romance,sarcasm, math,and language.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Nag A Ram About an Anagram

This came to mind while doing the last entry:

Economy = Oy, con me.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

The Name Game

I quote from The Gardian:

"Gazprom, NNPC agree to initial investment of $2.5 bln
New joint venture company to be called Nigaz"

This is interesting in a couple of dimensions.

First the obvious observation:

The Neosoviets are paying the price of their notorious racism. By running a whites only oil industry, they missed out on something pretty obvious here. I guess slang used by people who neither matter nor exist is irrelevant. I wonder if Nigaz will open up filling stations here? Why settle for self service at Venezuala's Citgo when you can get Nigaz to pump your gas for you. Unbelievable.

This might be the best naming blunder since the Electolux Panic in the 1960s.

Now the more disturbing observation:

This deal most likely gives the Neosoviets control of about 20% of the world's current petroleum production, and about 7.5% of estimated reserves. That's a lot of control. Now, a Russian autocrat's midnight fart has the real possibility of jacking oil prices back near $200 per barrel.

Although here in America, our mainstream media hasn't spent a lot of time connecting the dots between last year's spike in oil process and the collapse of our extremely vulnerable economy, the blogosphere is full of this stuff. Don't imagine that the Ayatollahs, Secret policemen and other oil-fortified nutjobs of the world haven't already figured this one out.

Don't worry, everything here is fine.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

National Weird Day

This morning's news -Farrah Faucet is dead today,age 62, long troubled by cancer. I don't know how she managed to look as together as she did up to the end. BTW, although Ms Faucett was great, as a kid I liked Charlie's black-haired angel better, but Farrah had some badass hair!

Memo to superannuated celebrities - DO NOT DIE ON THE SAME DAY AS MICHAEL JACKSON. As soon as Jacko's corpse was rolled into the morgue, poor Farrah sunk to a sad fate not unlike that of Peshtigo, Wisconsin. On the day of the Great Chicago Fire, Peshtigo suffered a fire far more devastating. Peshtigo remains forgotten to this day.

What can I say about Michael Jackson, dead at age 50. Great music, but creepy beyond the skin-crawling threshhold. If it wasn't for Jackson, Weird Al Yankovich would probably still be living with his parents.

I feel as weird as this today.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

OMG SOCIALISM OMG

I am sick and tired of hearing lumpen-filibusters about the evils of the Federal Government's new role as an owner of GM. The general course of one-way discussion is that Government-owned enterprise produces nothing of worth. No one has yet been able to explain to me why this is true.

Therefore, I took a few minutes to do some hardnosed case-study research on my own. Since the Paris Air Show was just last last week, I compared the leading aircraft manufacturers, the Governement owned and controlled Airbus versus the Boeing Corporation.

So, how are these two competitors performing these days?

At the air show, Airbus took orders for 108 aircraft, versus a whopping total of 2 orders for Boeing.

Point to Airbus, 15 love.

I thought this seemed pretty lopsided, until I dug deeper to seek the root causes of this discrepancy - I needed to be sure Boeing's sales staff hadn't developed leprosy last week.

Apparently, buyers have gotten cold feet over Boeing's apparent inability to deliver its latest model at any time or any place. They actually cancelled the heavily promoted demonstration flight that was to introduce the 787 Dreamliner to the world at last week's air show. Oopsy, It can't fly just yet. This liner of dreams lives only in our dreams.

Point to Airbus, 30, love.

What will happen once Boeing finally gets its 787 from a Dream-liner to Real-liner? Bloomberg projects more difficulties for Boeing.

From Bloomberg:

"The 787 had considerable early sales success, which forced Airbus to respond,” Raymond Jaworowski, senior aircraft analyst at Newtown, Connecticut-based Forecast International, said in a note from the Paris show. “However, the A350 is more than simply a 787 competitor. Airbus has positioned it to cover a broad spectrum of the widebody market.”

Point to Airbus, Advantage Airbus

The A350 is scheduled to enter service in 2013, giving Airbus two 300-plus seat models less than six years old to range against the 777, which debuted in 1995, the 767, dating from 1982, and the 747 jumbo, an aircraft that was delivered to airlines the year after man first landed on the moon."

Game Point, Airbus

In short Bloomberg is saying the Socialist Airbus is and will continue to offer its customers more desireable products and more innovation than the market-driven Boeing. I never thought I would live to see the day where Bloomberg admits Socialism meets customers needs better than capitalism.

Perhaps Government owned enterprise has its place in the world.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

This Made Me Laugh

With high temperatures almost 100 degrees, I take what thrills I can get.

Since I haven't had an original thought for I don't know how long, hers's something that made me laugh today.

political pictures for your blog
see more Political Pictures

Monday, June 22, 2009

I Miss The Ren and Stimpy Show

But, Guess What, kids, I found myself musing on our favorite disfunctional cat and Chihuhua couple who are amost back on the internets, except this site doesn't aactuallyhave the cartoons. here's a taste of what we are missing.


Thanks to the magic of the internets,we can enjoy some highlights.


The Top 5 Ren and Stimpy Moments of All Time - For more of the funniest videos, click here

This cartoon is even sicker than I remember. It's like animated Salvadore Dali without the good drawing.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

America is Better Than Iran

because. . .

The unrest in Iran makes me proud to live in a country where corrupt politicians are smart enough to keep rigged elections close

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Make A Golem in Your SpareTime!

Fellow World Wide Zionist Conspirators, members of the New World Order, Black Helicopter Pilots and Illuminati (no trilateral commissioners need apply, that's so twentieth century):

Thanks to Temple Emanuel in San Jose's websight (BTW, I think my nephew had his Bar Mitzvah there), we now now how to make a golem.. This is too strange not to share.

"An initiate should not do it alone, but should always be accompanied by one or two colleagues. The Golem must be made of virgin soil, taken from a place where no man has ever dug. The soil must be kneaded with pure spring water, taken directly from the ground. If this water is placed in any kind of vessel, it can no longer be used. The people making the Golem must purify themselves totally before engaging in this activity, both physically and spiritually. While making the Golem, they must wear clean white vestments… One must not make any mistake or error in the pronunciation… no interruption whatsoever may occur."

Here's a picture of my golem. OK,OK it's just a statue in Prague. Or so they say it's a just a statue. I suggest any Czech Neo-nazis out there might want to think twice about their behaviour (y'know, Czech and re-Czech), with this guy hanging around.



Some additional instructions and a pretty strange side comment from the October/November 1999 Edition of the Jewish Magazine.

"Many people today say that although we can not create a golem on the level of Rabbi Yehuda Leow of Prague, still we have succeeded in creating a different form of golem. Rabbi Leow took a blob of earth, gave it form and introduced into it vitality, but with out intellectual abilities."

And now, the punchline:

"Many say that our educational system has duplicated Rabbi Leow's feat, by taking intelligent children and turning out blobs."

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Reform As Good As The American People

Finally, after eating at Denny's, and "completely reconsidering what the American people are capable of achieving",the President is proposing reform we can attain.

To have any chance of retaining a position of global leadership, we must:

Spit into trash bins and not on the floor,

Walk to the liquor store down the block,instead of using millions of hybrid cars, and

Stop leaving home in sweatpants.



Obama Drastically Scales Back Goals For America After Visiting Denny's

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

$ave Our CEOs

Michael Moore is calling all true Americans to do what we can to save our CEOs!

Such Pathos, Such Patriotism! Youca can see the good men and women of America are flocking ot the cause.




That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Why Being Obama Matters

Eugene Robinson wrote a great column yesterday.

He's reflecting on PresObama's impact in our National relations with the Muslim world. It seems odd to think that Obama's personal history (i.e.,Obama being Obama) could become a powerful instrument of foreign policy.

Admitting that the driver of foreign is national interest, Robinson gives this evidence of the power of Obama as a person in foreign policy.

"Taking a cold-eyed view of international affairs is never wrong. But it’s also wrong to ignore the spectacle of an audience member, at Obama’s Cairo University speech, interrupting an American president to shout, "We love you!" You will recall that the last memorable presidential appearance in the Arab world was the news conference in Iraq at which two shoes were hurled at the head of George W. Bush."

What a difference a couple of hundred days make. Who'd have thought six months ago that an American President could lead a galdanged lovefest at an Islamic Egyptian University?

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Monday, June 08, 2009

It takes a thief. . .

. . . to finger the other thieving scumbags on Wall Street.

Notorious corrupt Wall Street thieving scumbag and convicted (note pre$idential pardon) felon Sandy Lewis (remember the furor when Bill Clinton pardoned this thieving scumbag on January 20, 2001?) wrote a great editorial in the New York Times blasting the current administration for not doing anything to address the legal thievery of Wall Street Banks that still threatens to further erode our well being. It's a good article.

Like onion rings when you have gastroparesis, greasy and rotting odors keeps coming up from Lower Manhattan.

I am enthusiastic because this article is the first time I have seen a Wall Street Scumbag use the press to point fingers at fellow Scumbags. If this is start of a trend, I think we're in for some fun! There is no comedy better than a bunch of thieving scumbags sitting in a circle ,each pointing to his right and sniveling. Almost worth the trillion dollar ticket price we've payed and will continue to pay. For the numerate types, that's $1,000,000,000,000.

To start your fun today, use Sandy's pardon and some white out to make your own pardons for all your criminal friends.

You don' have a lot of criminal friends, you say?

Well, then, you can forget about ever becoming President.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Friday, June 05, 2009

Listen To Ike


Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.

In the councils of government, we must guard against the acquisition of unwarranted influence, whether sought or unsought, by the military-industrial complex. The potential for the disastrous rise of misplaced power exists and will persist.

Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired, signifies in the final sense a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed.

Dwight D. Eisenhower

In this age of People magazine,I wonder if we'll ever see a bald President again.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Fearless Fosdicks Foil Food Fight

This weeks Flying Foods sighting is from Portage High School in Wisconsin.

The school's candyassed principal called in the local police when a couple of seniors started throwing yogurt around the lunchroom. It's always good to know your High School Principal knows how to scream like a bitch and push the panic button when it's time to put on her big girl panties and deal with it.

The food fight idiot - provocateurs stole the show,with these great interview quotes:

I really don't feel bad about it at all," Mitchell said. "(It) kind of was my idea. I don't really regret anything.""We already had all the yogurts, (then the) teacher walks up and my friend is like, 'Man, we can't do this.' And I was like, 'We got to do this. We already got all the stuff opened up,'" Mitchell said.

"(I) threw my milk. I picked it up, spilt it all over me, threw it," Mitchell said.

"We walked out of school in handcuffs and got a standing ovation from everyone in the school. It was pretty sweet," he said. "I think it was totally worth it."

The principal has refused to make a public statement for the TV news, however, she said in print; "her priority was to protect students from a so-called joke that could have turned violent, pooty pooty poot." (pooty pooty poot added by me)

"I don't think we overreacted. Basically, we just wanted to quell a disturbance before it gets out of hand," said Assistant Police Chief Kevin O'Neill. This is like a low IQ version of the "Minority Report", let's perfect our union by punishing people before crimes happen. To be fair to the cop, what can a cop do in a situation like that, once the panic-stricken, pantie-wetting principal called him to the scene.

IMHO the most striking thing about this story is the inaneness from all sides.

We must not forget in times like these that our precious rights are in danger. We must remain vigilant.

Was it Patrick Henry, or was it Soupy Sales who said, "When pies are outlawed, only outlaws will have pies". Aside - check out where Soupy pies Frank Sinatra about 10 seconds into the video! I can't believe he didn't end up in several hefty bags.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Requiem David Carradine

David Carradine was found dead in his hotel room Thailand today, where he was working on a film. I thought I need to write something before any possibly sad or gruesome details of his death leak out.

Why do I care about this guy? Two Words, "Kung Foo". Three words,"Kung Foo, dammit"!

For me David Carradine and "Kung Foo" are inseparable. The show started on the toob when I was an pre-teen and early teenager. What 12 year old boy would be able to resist this?



Just the opening credits had more cool and deep stuff than any hour-long TV show today. Pseudo-philosophy, snatch-the-pebble, throwing stars, fighting with sticks, deflecting spears and cool dragon scars.

"Grasshopper" gave us something that a world dominated by Nixon and carpet bombing just couldn't give us.

All this wrapped up in a western full of bad guys. This was every kid's favorite show. If you were a kd, everybody really was kung fu fighting.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

I'm Still Praying ot the Aliens

Attxntion Pxoplxs of Planxt Xarth.

You havx failxd to hxxd my prxvious warnings, you didn’t xvxn takx mx to your lxadxr. This is my last mxssagx to you. If you do not all immxdiatxly rxplacx your intxrnal combustion vxhiclxs and nuclxar wxapons with pogo sticks and rubbxr bands, your pathxtic planxt will bx consumxd by a giant intxrgalactic jxllyfish callxd Nigxl. I havx lxft an imagx of Nigxl to put fxar in your pathxtic hxarts.


Shakx in fxar xarthly wxaklings!


That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

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I must enjoy shouting into a vacuum, but I think about getting my act together one of these days. My mom says I am very handsome and intelligent.

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