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Life and Times of an itinerant slacker in Sacramento. Thrills, Spills Galore coming soon. Not to mention lots of opinions.

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Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Steve Jobs and Pancreas Tumor Rumors

The financial media is abuzz this week with all sorts of speculation about Steve Job’s permanent health. In 1983 Jobs had a neuroendocrine tumor of the pancreas and surgical treatment similar to mine. Jobs has discussed this publicly several times, reassuring investors that he was over this and everything was fine. Somehow, the business community managed to buy his story at face value for the past several years.

However, Jobs has appeared rather thin and gaunt (really thinner and gaunter than usual) at a couple of recent public appearances. This has lead to a flurry of internet rumors early this week, culminating in a 10% drop in Apple’s share price Monday night. The price appears to have recovered through Tuesday, no doubt enriching some day traders.

The rumors began by insinuating that Jobs’s weight loss might be related to the return of some cancer. Over Tuesday and early Wednesday, financial reporters and bloggers dug deeper and figured out that life is not a cake walk after this surgery. In particular, people have figured out this surgery can lead to digestive problems and related weight loss and fatigue.

Although I hate to see anybody, no matter how arrogant and smug they might be, have problems like mine, it is somehow comforting to be reminded that it’s not all in my head. That’s especially comforting after hearing Jobs insinuate for years that the surgery was no big deal for him.

As some Klingon Woman once said to Commander Riker; ”If you cannot stomach Kingon food, would you like me to nurse you?”

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Jib Jab is Back in the Campaign!

I laughed all the way through this. Laughed so hard I almost cried.

Hillary's frying pan
McCain's battle tank
Obama's Unicorn.

Who could ask for anything more?

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Monday, July 14, 2008

Recorders Don't Get No Respect

This great example of rare Scandanavian humor might explain why.

Michala Petri is one of the world's leading recorder soloists,although after watching this, she appears more like a female Jack Benny.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

The Actuary Song

There should be a law against something like this. Fortunately,being "off-broadway",we can rest assured we'll never hear of this again.

The Actuary Song - I Love You Because Off-Broadway Cast

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Thank You, Congress

(Referring to the July 8th, 2008 vote on FISA legislation.)

That's my story,and ain't nobody left to fight for my right to tell it.

Sunday, July 06, 2008

And They Call The Left Coast Crazy

Cornhole is taking the Nation by storm!

I stumbled across a craze that I've been told is rocking the Midwest. Here's a promotional photo from the insidious promoters of this most oddly named craze. On their website, they flatly admit that their mission is to introduce their friends and neighbors to the game of Cornhole. Just the kind of friendly neighbors I've always wanted.

Apparently, Cornholing is about tossing beanbags or cornbags through a hole in a box. I like lawn games as much as the next guy, but I wouldn't be caught dead at a cornhole tournament. I get a physical exam every year,and that's enough for me.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Tuesday, July 01, 2008


At the MIL’s pleading, we went to Best Buy to each pick up Our Government-subsidized FATASS (Federally Approved Television Antenna Signal Sorter). Peggy has two ancient TVs she doesn’t connect to the cable. They (the TVs, not the MIL) are both too old to be compatible.

What was strange about the Government coupons is that the coupons came with directions advising me that Wal-Mart is the nearest place for me to purchases my FATASS. Speaking of conspiracy theories, get this; the Federal Government is directing citizens to shop at Wal-Mart, WTF. This must have something to do with Hilarity Clinton and the Trilateral Ommission (Didn’t they record with Motown?). I’ve heard talk of an email chain going around suggesting that if Sen. Obama becomes President, we’ll see Hilarity seated as a Supreme Court Justice. I don’t know why, but this doesn’t scare me at all. It could possibly please me. AS long as I have totally strayed from the subject, it’s time for a...

Quick aside on our alternative lifestyle...

We don’t do cable here, however I admit to watching cable shows once or twice a week at the MIL’s place. We also share a Netflix subscription with our quirky neighbor,and we watch movies together a lot. I am OK with cable and netflix if they bring people together. By rocking against the corporate individualistic paradigm, we can consume the goods and still avoid the isolation that is part and parcel of the consumer experience in our corporate age. Oh yes, we can also maintain the smugness.

Getting back to the story...

I installed the FATASS, and I must say FATASS + HDTV + rabbit ears = total kick ass reception! Our reception for all the local channels is crystal clear. In addition, we get two extra channels from our local public TV station, and 24 hour news and weather program from two of the local network affiliates. If I knew I could get this before the official HDTV doomsday, I would have done this earlier. Now I can actually see all the local stations using my rabbit ears. Take that, Comcast!

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

About Me

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I must enjoy shouting into a vacuum, but I think about getting my act together one of these days. My mom says I am very handsome and intelligent.

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