Our Desert Trip; Part 2

Part 2 in which we stay at 29 Palms, see a lot of desert stuff, and Owls.

We stayed at Roughley Manor, a great place in 29 Palms. Good rooms, interesting and nice owners, and a nest of baby owls we observed in a nearby tree. I strongly recommend this place to anyone staying in 29 Palms. The breakfasts alone are worth the extra cost here.



When we booked our hotels, we looked at tripadvisor.com . The reviews were very helpful. I was amazed at how many places had incredibly horrible reports from dozens of travelers. That site probably saved us from several crummy nights, and helped us find two really good places to stay.

Now, time for vacation photos.

Joshua Tree (where the streets have no name) was great! We had good weather, with breezy highs below 70 degrees. The desert was full of flowers.

After visiting the park office, we started with a short interpretive walk to Skull Rock
This short trail near a campground and the office’s garden had lots of plant identification markers. Although interpretive trails are generally candy assed, they help me learn to recognize some flora. We saw flowers everywhere.

Skull rock itself was pretty awesome. Shiver me timbers.



In the same way this Joshua Tree Park has very little to do with Bono and his ‘wheeze and roll’ U2 buddies, I expect this skull rock is not closely related to the notorious Burning Blade Clan’s hideout in World of Warcraft. It’s amazing what you can learn from Google.

We took a less wimpy walk to 49 Palms Oasis. As advertised, there really was an oasis with palm trees, flowering shrubs ,and even hummingbirds. The oasis hasn’t had water at the surface fro several years, due to a dropping water table. This was a cool place, in every meaning of the word.



The walk to and from the oasis was filled with desert wildflowers. I didn’t even try to identify them. Here’s some of them.





This is the beaver tail cactus, although without the pink flowers, they look a lot like a prickly pear.




A park ranger was very excited to see this flower near the trailhead parking lot.She took this picture with my camera,since the flower was on a slippery gravel slope marked as off limits to visitors. I think this is called a flaming star.


All the barrel cactus were red. The ranger said they are always red. Go figure.



This was a beautiful hike, but we noticed the conspicuous absence of Joshua trees along this trail. That was funny, since we drove through miles of valley full of the things on the way to the trailhead.

We addressed that issue the next morning, when we hiked to Pine City. This hike started out through a plain dotted with Joshua trees, and moved on to several rocky ridges and canyons. The hike went past several pine canyons,which we did not recognize as pine canyons. But it was beautiful.

Finally, pictures of joshua trees.





This might have been a pine canyon, I think the scrubby fir shrub in the left foreground may have qualified as a pine.


Mysterious pine canyons or not, I don't think there's anything as desolate yet oddly attractive looking as a field of joshua trees.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Our Desert Trip; Part 1

Part 1 in which we drive from Sacramento to 29 Palms, and see where suburban sprawl and rural poverty meet in California’s Central Valley.

We visited some desert parks and missions last week. It was a good vacation for both of us, as well as a source of grist for the blog. I expect to do several entries over the week about our experience with Southern CA.

This is the first time I had ever driven down the dreaded highway 5. Although we left the highway well before Los Angeles, most of it was a very dull drive, with one exception. A stretch of a little over 50 miles south of Tracy runs though the edge of the foothills, with views of the California aqueduct below. The rest of the route is a constant fight against falling asleep.

We stopped at Wonderful Wasco, CA for lunch. I have never seen a town with so many boarded up businesses. That’s not surprizing, given that the official unemployment rate in the Central Valley is about 20% (remember, cub economists, the federal unemployment rates exclude most long term unemployed workers). We drove down the main street looking for local restaurants, and the first three we saw were boarded up. We ended up eating at Perko’s, a California chain. The waitresses were all fluent in Spanish and English, and an old guy in the next booth was a packers fan. The place felt a little like Kenosha in the 1980’s but dryer and sunnier. Mothballed business became an underlying theme of this trip.

As the chamber of commerce tells us, Wasco is ‘just’ 130miles north of Los Angeles. In California’s wacky relativistic universe, that made Wasco a potential gold mine for developers. We could see this partially completed development from Perko’s. I don’t know what will happen to these unfinished and abandoned developments.



We saw a lot of parched fields and orchards full of dead trees. Apparently, as water has become more scarce, agribusiness has figured out they can make more money by selling water rights to Southern California urban areas than they can make growing stuff. Great deal, except for those of us who like to eat. Expect more on this at your grocery store this fall.

Next (really first) stop is 29 Palms and Joshua Tree.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Another From xkcd

Another good cartoon from xkcd.

"AL Gore Doomed Us All, Run!" I haven't heard an Al Gore line that good since Manbearpig ran loose in Surburban Colorado.

I'll do a real blog entry one of these days, maybe a travelogue of our trip next week to Anza Borrego, Joshua tree and San Diego. Expect no blog entries next week. I plan to be doing things more fun than making blog entries.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

A Yellow Shafted Afternoon

I went for a walk in by the river this afternoon, to enjoy the sunny seventy degree weather. I saw this critter along the way.


Using this picture and the Peterson Field Guide, think this is a Yellow - Shafted Flicker. I was excited to see this bird, since usually the only woodpecker - type birds I see are Nutall's Woodpeckers. Although the Nutall's woodpecker is unique to coastal and central California, it 's nice to see a different bird for a change. Geeze-o-pete,I sound like a British dirty old man.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Credit Default Swaps Explained (In Under Two Minutes)

This is the clearest explanation of AIG's credit default swap mess That I have ever seen. In less than two minutes, you can learn how AIG produced a multi-trillion dollar housing bubble and killed the goose that laid the golden egg.



That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

The Class Warfare Has Started - It's Official!

Daniel Gross Broke the News in Newsweek. Newsweek, dammit, not some lefty blog full of 9/11 conspiracy theories. We're talking Newsweek, My 85 year old DMIL's favorite weekly magazine!

Rather than the usual class warfare of the rich versus everyone else, Gross reports we are in the midst of a class-based civil war pitting the rich against the not quite so rich. The time respected tactic of bilking seems to be the most common weapon in the conflict. I am sorry to say that the lumpensheeple have failed to wake up. At this point in time, the proletariat have not stepped into the fight.

I am becoming a big Daniel Gross fan, admittedly I have jumped on the bandwagon a little late. When I realize that I'm depending on an octogenarian to point out the latest trends,maybe it's time for me to get out a little more.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Too Sweet Not To Share

This chart from the geekish websight XKCD was just too darned cute not to share.



Ahhh, Geeks in Love.

That's my stroy and I'm sticking to it.

My Big Fat Gay Quaker Wedding

My early music recorder group had the pleasure of playing music for a Society of Friends (i.e. Quaker) wedding ceremony for two guys who had a civil ceremony last summer. We provided about ½ hour of music prior to the beginning of the service, which was similar to a regular Quaker meeting, with a short break for vows and signing of the Sacramento Friends Meeting House's marriage document.

The wedding was a real experience. We played pretty well, with the strengths and weaknesses in our playing that we always experience. Recorders like to wander in and out of close tuning. The crowd seemed to enjoy the music, even the poor souls who came in last and had to sit about three feet in front of us. I think we added something to the affair. Several people complemented us, so either we played well or they are a very polite Meeting of Friends, or both.

The ceremony was totally a non-ceremony, like, what vows? what ceremony? That’s pretty much how Quakers, being the masters of British antiestablishmentarianism inspired understatement, like to do ceremonies. (antiestablishmentarianism, WOOT! I have waited my entire life to use this word in its proper context!)

The grooms processed at the end of our last number, a Marin Marias rondeau, not the Masterpiece Theater rondeau but equally appropriate for a Louis XIV era procession. To be completely honest it really wasn’t much of a procession. As we were winding the down, the grooms walked in the Meeting room and sat down in two chairs in the center, in front of a card table holding the very large Marriage document.

The Meeting’s Clerk read the rules, one hour of silent meditation, where we each are free to speak if so moved. Do these guys know how to party or what?

The ceremony was the same as a regular Sunday Quaker meeting, except for the couple of minutes when the grooms stood, made very short vows (about 5 words) and signed the certificate. That moment felt more like applying for life insurance than a typical protestant wedding. On this festive day, many were 'moved to speak', including a member of the California Assembly (Mariko Yamada from Davis, who officiated their civil ceremony). There is great concern right now, as a court is drafting its decision on the validity of Proposition 8 ,which may prohibit the State’s recognition of same-sex marriage. No one knows how this decision might impact existing marriages, whether the marriages will continue to exist. One of the guys had some community activism in his background, so given the timing of this wedding, some who were moved to speak might be accused of political grandstanding. However most who spoke said nice things about the guys, as it should be IMHO. They seem like decent guys. I cannot begrudge the politically motivated speakers, since much of my motivation for playing is that this is the most constructive way I can thumb my nose at the 51% of California voters who are far less enlightened than I. I hadn’t even met the grooms before the wedding.

Seriously, check out Proposition 8,the Musical for something very strange and only about three minutes.

BTW the guys were rather large-bodied fellows in their mid 50's. They both seemed rather quiet types, and were dressed in slacks and loose fitting short sleeved shirts. One of the grooms looked a little bit like a darker Rush Limbaugh, the Herman Goering of the New and Improved Republican Party,but only from behind. They looked like your typical fifty something civil service office workers. They seemed like a good couple, given that the guy who is a Quaker early on had agreed to unload a lot of his book collection (someone said something about 20 cartons of books) so both guys could fit their stuff into one house, and the other guy, who is not a Quaker, agreed to put up with this ceremony.

The silences were pretty long. I found that each time I began really working at meditating someone would be moved to speak. At that moment, I needed to stop my meditation, and focus on the speaker. I found it difficult to meditate when anticipating an interruption at any moment. I must admit that it seems those whom you wish wouldn’t be moved to speak are so moved.

We stayed for the short and informal reception, where we signed the Society’s marriage certificate. All who attend the meeting are considered witnesses. I spoke with one of the grooms and several of the friends. It was a friendly crowd of Friends. One of the friends thought I would be an excellent addition to the meeting, after hearing about my slackerly existence. I amnot sure whether to take that as a complement or a slam. There were sandwiches and some homemade chocolate-dipped strawberries. They didn’t have any oatmeal anywhere, nor did anyone resemble the Quaker oats guy in any way, except perhaps in girth.

Assemblyperson Yamada and I spoke for about two minutes as we were holding our plastic champagne glasses filled with apple juice and waiting for the toast (did I mention that these Friends really know how to party?) Of course, we became immediate best friends for that moment. You've got to love that about politicians. She seemed very nice.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Bloody Vikings and Their Financial Collapse; Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam

This month’s Vanity Fair features a quirky and fascinating article about Iceland and its evolution from a sleepy fishing culture to a deluded international banking culture to a failed culture. This longish article is worth reading.

Michael Lewis looks at this absurd situation by visiting Iceland and just talking to people and his giving off-hand observations about this small country full of overeducated Norsemen who seem to personally know everyone else in the country,and have taken to burning their Land Rovers for the insurance money.

I am not sure what point Lewis is trying to make, he seems to be trying to comfort us by making the claim that Iceland’s situation is different from the rest of the world, and their collapse is somehow related to uniquely Icelandic foibles. In other words, don’t worry, be happy.

For a little lighter entertainment,

Another, much briefer article in this month’s Vanity Fair documents the accuracy of Thomas Freidman’s previous predictions.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Time to Shoot the Recession

If you’re like me, you are sick of hearing that sucking sound coming from south of Canada’s border. Time to rise up and do something about it! (Or at least take some pictures of it.) Slate.com has started a Flickr group where people “shoot the recession”. Some of the pictures are pretty good. Maybe we’ll even see a Walker Evans for our times.

Anyway here'sone of my favorite early submissions.

I wonder if the proprietors of this fun pottery party business had their heads in the kiln when they came up with his one:



That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Something Worked on My Windows Machine!

I was able to complete the download of the McAfee Security software,including disabling and uninstalling the prior software in about one hour. I only had two false starts! (Note to Mac users - gettings something done right the third time in windows is almost a miracle). If I had prayed to Mother Theresa before I started the download, this miracle would surely have satisfied the requirments for sainthood. During the process, I spent I did some praying out loud to Saint O'Fucket, the beloved patron saint of Windows users and stumbling Irishmen.

While I was watching the download process, I was able to get in some good woodshedding time with this piece of old music. It still amazes me what you can get for free on the internet. It really isn't that hard to figure out why publishing is not profitable. I also took a couple of runs through an old arrangement of Greensleeves,probably from early Elizabethan times,give or take a few generations. Funny to find 'Greensleeves' on a French websight, hmmmmmmmmm. Perhaps there's more to this Unites States of Europe business than I had expected. I smell a conspiracy,ripe with the odor of a Stilton smeared fromagerie. I knew the Chunnel would result in nothing but trouble.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

The Truth About Home Electronics

All is revealed.

Thanks to The Onion,and Wil Wheaton for pointing this out.

Note - this is full of foul language and is therefore rated NSFW.


Sony Releases New Stupid Piece Of Shit That Doesn't Fucking Work

This is helping me prepare to install new security suite software (AT&T is switching applications) tomorrow,when I just might sound just like those interviews.

Thats my #*&%ing story and I'm #$*^ing sticking to it. You got a problem with that?

Letter to the Recorder Tooting Membership

See it here first! My soon to be published letter to the Recorder Society membership.

Here we go! (Note, the punchline is at the end)

I have had a couple of musical experiences in our broader community over the last few weeks.

Kathleen and I heard the Sacramento Philharmonic Orchestra at the Community Center Theater last night. We enjoyed a varied program along with a nearly full house. Both the orchestra and the featured violin and oboe soloists were great. I recommend the cheap seats for the Philharmonic, since the acoustics are better in the top tier. Bring your binoculars. It’s always good to see over 1,000 of our neighbors, including a lot of young adults, come out for a classical music event.

On the lighter side, I had the opportunity to play Guitar Hero a few weeks ago. I didn’t get much of a kick out of playing, since the actual game play is not very musical. However, I did email Activision, to suggest they produce a 'Recorder Consort Hero' game. I haven’t heard back yet. Perhaps they’re on vacation.

The SRS is providing great opportunities over the next few months for you to be the Recorder Consort Hero you know you’ve always wanted to be. Now is the time to 'Unleash your inner renaissance legend'!

Your Humble CoPresident

I really could get into Recorder Consort Hero. I really could.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

An Early Music Pioneer was a Dork!

Arnold Dolmetsch really was a pioneer of the revival of early music that took place in the 20th Century. As this video proves, he was also kind of a dork,in an early 20th century free love sort of way.

If for no other reason,watch this video for the dancing. It made me laugh until I almost peed.



As long as we're on the subject,this next video is from a Dutch guy who mostly plays baroque and renaissance string instruments. Here he's playing one of my favorite songs to play. I can do this too, almost as well as him. This is 'Under the Linden Tree (Onder Der Linded Groene)', as written by Jacob Van Eyck,and published in 1651 as part of 'Der Fluten Lust Hof'. This is an good example of the music that was popular in Northern Europe at the time.



Why care about this, you might ask? I'll tell you why. Van Eyck lived in the times of The Three Musketeers and Captain Alatriste (OK, if they weren't fictional characters,this would have been the time in which they lived). If they perchance ever met, It would have been near Utrecht,where both parties went to fight the heretic protestants. This is the music they would have heard. Although Van Eyck was a Dutch Protestant, these heroes may have spared him,given that he was a blind older man by this time. So There.

BTW,you might notice more than a passing resemblence between Captain Alatriste and the King of All Free Peoples of Middle Earth.


That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Finally, Someone Shows Courage

Bwaaahaaaahaaaaa,

Against the president's objections,Congress tells bank executives to go bite themselves!

First,check out this diatribe from CSPAN.



In addition to a lot of noisy scolding, congress has actually done something about our president's demands that we must support these scumbags through the TARP.

Finally,someone has apparently stood up and written a law that will actually limit the rape of our tax dollars by overly gorged bank executives.

As a still loyal adherent to the cult of Obama,it's interesting that the Prez stood against this. the old Who lyric, 'Meet the new boss,same as the old boss' is every day playing louder in my head. I am starting to struggle with some cognitive dissonance here.

My favorite comments from those who fear the poor executives will be underpaid is the 'There will be a brain drain in the banking industry' whinge. If what we've seen is the product of the industry's best and brightest, perhaps these brains need to be sent down the drain (what kind of financial genius gives mortgages to families with no income,anyway?). The last time I checked, there was no shortage of smart people willing to work for the grossly inadequate sum of $500,000 per year.

This brings up an interesting question; What good are banks if they are nearly insolvent and no one trusts them? I wish someone would answer that question before pouring even more billions into these dysfunctional organizations.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

‘Bladerunner’, A Typical 'Dickless' Sci Fi Film

After over 25 years, I guess I had waited long enough to see this film.I got a disk including both the studio cut (super happy ending included) and the director’s cut without voiceover or happy ending. I liked the voiceovers, but I might call the added happy ending moronic, however I do not wish to insult morons. Perhaps Ridley Scott was locked out of the studio when the suits added the mega happy ending. I am too lazy to watch the extras on the DVD to find out for sure.

I give the movie 2 ½ stars. It’s worth watching if you like detective films set in a dystopic near future. The chase and kill the bad guys story arc is fun, and the visuals are cool. Vangeles’s score is a winner. The IMDB reviews are steller, perhaps that’s because Science Fiction film fans haven’t read enough of the best written Science Fiction to tell doodoo from shinola.

Phillip K Dick’s Brilliant novel, ‘Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?’ created a very strange and disturbing near future dystopia, where most of the earth’s population of humans and animals have been destroyed, and only humans deemed unfit for colonization on other planets are left behind, living in nearly empty cities. Earth's inahbitants are slowly being poisoned. The folks left on earth are faced with some interesting dilemmas, overlaid with a pervasive sense of sadness and loneliness.

Earth residents’ most prized possessions are the few animals left surviving, however, all but the wealthiest keep replicant animals.The protagonist in the novel yearns to own an electric sheep. Replicant animals are a major industry. There are very few living animals to see.

Worshippers of the popular religion attach themselves to devices that allow them to share the pain and injuries of their profit, as he eternally climbs a hill only to be stoned and thrown down.

The novel dealt with some serious existential questions, as it becomes apparent that an individual cannot be sure whether he is a human being or a replicant.

'Bladerunner' however, didn’t deal with any of these questions, except in a few short moments of sophomoric dialogue. It was all about chasing the bad guys.

Even with these shortcomings, I can’t fairly expect a movie to be as good as one of the best Science Fiction novels ever written. I was not transported to 'Milton Lumky Territory' or anywhere, for that matter.

I give this film 2 ½ stars, although it didn’t do dick for me.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

First Depressant Drug Released

Despondex!

Finally, there is relief for the annoyingly cheerful!

No longer will we have to put up with excessive hugging or squealing when friend calls on the phone.

Mr Coffee in the 21st Century

After well over 10 years, I decided it was finally time to replace our old Mr Coffee.

While I was setting up the new and redesigned Mr Coffee, I had both designs right next to each other. The comparison was surprising, and it somehow reinvigorated my faith in the future of humankind.

First have a look at the old Mr Coffee:








Nothing exciting going on here, until I let my eyes go out of focus.




















Here's what I saw when I focused through the heart.







Next,I took a long look at Mr Coffee, The Second Generation:
































Somehow, the parallel was blatantly apparent.

Star Trek has become a dominant a paradigm in industrial design.




Perhaps the Revenge of the Nerds is finally complete. Well at least in the most important arena of counter top appliance design.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it, just as soon as I'm done washing my pocket protector.

Double Your Pleasure, Double Your Fun

Double Vision's gotta hold of me.

Just like Foreigner, that 70's rock nightmare has found me again.

'Ooh, double vision, I need my double vision
It takes me out of my head, takin me out of my head
I get my double vision, oh, seeing double double
Oh, I have double vision, yeah, Im getting double vision...'

I started seeing double on Friday. I went to an optometrist first, who kindly adjusted my glasses, and then told me the glasses weren't the problem, and that I absolutely had to see a doctor right away. Nice.

The doctor sent me to the ER, fortunately I got in and out by about 8:00 PM, so I missed the ER weekend night pandemonium. That's a quick $4,000 or $5,000 down the drain. Had a CAT scan, seemed to prove for once and for all that I do have a brain,and no visible damage from stroke,no deadly brain tumors,no old guys gathering wool in there. Blood tests ruled out all the scary causes of this embarrassing and inconvenient business.

This deal (sixth cranial nerve palsy)normally sorts itself out within a couple or three months. Right now,I am trying to figure out how to function. I see pretty well most of the time, but I can't read with both eyes open. When I drive, I just close the affected eye when things get weird. I'm using a rather jaunty Long John Silver style eye patch for reading, which I can't do with both eyes open. My students should get a real kick out of that next week. This is really stupid.

I was actually relieved, since a couple of years ago, my band's alto sax player showed up at Kaiser's Ophthalmologist with similar symptoms, was sent to the ER for tests that showed a brain tumor,and he died a couple of months later. For once, I am not the complicated patient.

I'll see an ophthalmologist as soon as I can,following the ER doctor's directions. Then it'll be wait for the weak eye to get back to work.

This is like having the worst part of being drunk (OK,maybe the worst besides puking) with none of the fun.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Cats at the Gates

We are thinking about getting two cats. I have been working on names,and one of my favorites (of course, only if the names fit) is Dante and Virgil.

It looks like someone else had a similar idea, I think it works pretty well.


more animals

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

The Truth About Zombies!

Finally, thanks to hackers in Illinois and Texas, the truth about the zombie invasion has been revealed.







The Evile Corporate Guardians of the Dominant Cultural Paradigm is doing its best to lull the sheeple back into their dream by telling the gullible that this prophetic warning is simply a prank.

Don't drink the coolaid!

Oil your chainsaws!

Hold your brain-pulverizing shovel at the ready!

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

It’s All Happening at the River

Since the weather was so nice today, I took a walk in the Effie Yeaw Nature Center’s land by the American River. I was surprised to see that much of the action in Sacramento these days is happening by the river.

First, I ran into our esteemed legislature, wandering around aimlessly for a change.



Who did I find wandering around in his own world? You guessed it, I ran into the Governator himself.



Ignoring the political happenings, I ran into this aw shucks darling display of deer just being deer.



As a special bonus for readers in colder climates, I stumbled across an early sign of spring. These wild daffodils smelled as good as they looked.



That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Geography Can Be Fun, Really

Alright, people, no snickering.

Yes,

The New York Times provided this great map.

Thanks to the British and their remarkable skills at coming up with ridiculous names for small villages,geography has become fun again.

Back in the olden days, when I was working in Britain, our local rambling club had its annual Christmas hike and lunch at an inn in standing just behind this quaint village sign, I kid you not.



That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Words to Live By

The Guardian has provided today's words to live by in its article covering today's general strike in France. The strike is protesting of the Government's failure to do anything about rising unemployment.

Today's words to live by. . .

'The latest unemployment figures could not be released today because statisticians are on strike.'

I don't know why, but that made me smile deep, deep inside.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Traveling for work

The Onion featured a story that,from my previous experience,captures the essence of business travel.

'DES MOINES, IA—While en route to visit her cousin in South Bend, local divorcee Janet Linden, 37, told reporters Monday that her initial self-consciousness at drinking a beer by herself at Dugan's Sports Bar in the Des Moines International Airport was somewhat mitigated after she saw a woman approximately her age doing the same. "I guess it's not that bad," Linden said as she straightened herself up in her bar stool and brushed some cat hair off her skirt. "What's wrong with a single, independent woman having a cold beer while she's waiting for her flight? It's perfectly normal. Just ask that lady over there." Linden considered approaching the other woman to chat before realizing she had been looking at a mirror at the other end of the darkened bar.'

I remember once running into I guy from college at the Minneapolis airport,both of us in suits from client meetings and exhausted at the end of our traveling weeks. We had a drink together and entertained ourselves by pointing out other folks in the airport who looked as washed out as we did. There was no shortage.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

A Musical Personality Disorder

In my amateur music career, I have encountered some repeated instances of an annoying personality disorder that I have defined as NAMBES, Novelty Amateur Musician Blowhard Expressive Disorder. The severity of this order varies among individuals, with the more mild cases being only annoying, and the severe cases approaching comprehensive dysfunction.

The most remarkable observable symptom of NAMBES is the compulsion to share one’s belief that one possesses unique and excellent knowledge of music and musicianship through talking about music, while demonstrating mediocre musical abilities at best.

NAMBES is most commonly found in practitioners the more obscure musical genres and instruments (novel musical applications). The afflicted individual needs to specialize in a field of music that is rarely performed or taught in schools, such as renaissance music. The self delusion of excellence necessary to fuel this disorder is difficult to maintain if one plays a more common instrument, such as piano, guitar or any of the normal band and orchestra instruments. In the case of a more common instrument, the presence several of truly superior musicians in the community (possibly in the house next door) makes maintaining the delusion of one’s superior skills very difficult. Therefore, you can observe this syndrome readily in early music organizations.

The most remarkable observable symptoms are seen in communications. The typical case will not be able to resist vocally enumerating the irrational basis of his excellent musicianship, such as fabricated personal relationship with noted musicians (sorry, no pun intended). The individual will normally exhibit musical skills at a level near or below the average skill levels reference group in which he participates, or claims to have participated in. The individual will be unable to critically evaluate his playing, while freely providing unsolicited advice and criticism of other’s playing. The individual will normally exhibit a level of listening skills insufficient for successful social interaction. The individual is normally shunned by other members of community music groups.

In the most severe cases, the individual will describe to others a personal history that can not be verified, and appears to be fabricated at best. As other members of musical groups react negatively to the individual, he may fabricate even more fantastic fabrications, which reveal inconsistencies that are obvious to the listener.

If you want to meet several of these individuals, I suggest you become president of a local early music society.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Saint Vincent Lombardi Performs another Miracle!

In the wake of yesterdays airplane crash in New York, I couldn’t believe everyone survived. Turns out a higher power, none other than Saint Vincent Lombardi, soon to become the patron saint of cheese and whining nasal accents, intervened in a Time of Great Need.

I quote from the New York Times:

The lead officials in Thursday’s rescue spoke about the coordinated efforts amid the brisk current and freezing temperatures that enabled every passenger and crew member to reach the shore safely.

‘I was worried if we didn’t get them out right away,’ said New York Waterway captain Vincent Lombardi, first on the scene, ‘there would have been casualties.’

What more evidence of miracles do we need for sainthood? That’s right Pope Benny, I am talking to you. If you can make Pope Pius the Nazi Collaborator a saint for his miracle of silence and collaboration during the genocide of millions (while you were parading around in your brown shirt, I might add), canonizing Vince Lombardi is the least you could do.

Ave Saint Vincent Lombardi of the Green Bay!




Seven weeks indulgence is granted for reading this post while standing on your head, because I say so.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

On A Mission, Mission San Francisco Sonoma, That Is

We visited Mission San Francisco Solano on Monday, on K’s furlough day. K now has one mandatory furlough day per month, along with all management employees at the City. We decided to use each furlough day to do something fun and different. K chose her day well, the weather was unseasonably beautiful. We had sunny skies and high temperatures in the 70’s.

The Mission is located adjacent to the town square in Sonoma, which is a beautiful small city surrounded by vineyards and gentle green hills. The mission looked exactly how I would expect a mission to look.




This mission’s history is tied to General Vallejo, who was a pretty interesting guy. He managed to prosper under Spanish, Mexican, and American rule. No small task. This is the only mission built by the Mexico, and it is the last mission built in California. Mexico wanted a mission further inland than San Francisco, whose damp weather had caused health problems, and they wanted a military presence closer to the Russian outpost at Fort Ross. In 1834, the mission was secularized and General Vallejo was given command. The original Franciscans had more or less given up on the mission after a revolt of the much abused neophytes (Christianized natives) in 1826. It’s amazing they didn’t revolt in all the missions, given the inhumane treatment they received. However, it is interesting that the clay roofs we associate with mission architecture were developed in response to the need for roofs that could withstand flaming arrows.

One of the barracks rooms was been restored. What seemed strange to me was the short length of the sabers. Perhaps the troops didn’t anticipate using them on horseback. I liked seeing the classic Zorro felt hat on the shelf.



These barracks have their own historical relevance. Their soldiers ignited the Bear Flag Rebellion , and revolted in the mission’s plaza. Supposedly, the flag was crafted in the room you see here.

The original flag was lost in a fire following the San Francisco Earthquake, but some folks made a detailed copy in 1905. That flag is displayed at the mission.



The mission’s church was decorated in the early 20th century, and it is a good example awesomely strange interiors you can see in Mexican churches all over California.





This mission is run as the State Park, and it has a great museum. It’s worth a visit.

General Vallejo’s house is a ten minute walk from the mission, across beautiful trails. Central Sonoma is gorgeous. The house itself is a Victorian, filled with knickknacks built by a man who was above all a modern man of his age.




That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Prince Harry - Racist Sloganeer or Military Banterer?

Britain has its collective knickers once more in a twist about the off-color remarks of their young Prince Harry.

This time, he was caught calling a fellow soldier a Paki, which in British slang is an uncomplementary ethnic slur used against British of Pakistani origin. The Guardian's take on this provides good reading,including interviews with some British military personel about the usage of offensive banter.

This short excerpt from an interview with a senior NCO was too much fun to keep to myself.

'I might call somebody a bent bastard and the guy might be a homosexual but I don't mean it like that. It depends how it is said. If I went up to him and jabbed him in the chest and said "you are a fucking bent bastard" then it would be using the term badly, but if I want to go up to someone and say "come on you bent bastard, get a move on" then that's quite a different thing. . . The guy that Harry called a Paki wasn't crying or moaning about it. You don't know if he gave him much stick back and called him a posh ginger twat.'

I can't help love an enilisted man who speaks to defend the Prince by calling him a 'posh ginger twat'. A satirical genius is at work in the British Army!

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Oh, Those Wild and Crazy British

A friend just emailed me a link to an unbelievable British farce. This is definitely worth reading.

Obsession, deception,comic relief,it's all there, in real life,

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Six Digits,We Have Six Digits!

After a short drive to practice with my Friday consort, the deed is done. Finally,I can truly feel secure in my membership in the Junky Car Club.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

On The Edge of Greatness

I am a mere three miles from attaining a goal I have only dreamed of all my life. Yep,I'm gonna git 100,000 miles outta our a 1996 Honda Civic. I have been driving that car for the last seven years. Stay tuned to see what it looks like with the big 1 on the left!

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

A Culture War I can Believe In

Tom Hodgekinson, Britain's idler,has declared war on the Dominant paradigm. The first battle is the Do Less Campaign. I quote from The Idler:

'The way to thrive in 2009 is simply to join the Idler’s Do Less Campaign. It’s simple: you just do less. That means less shopping, less driving, less holidaying, less working, less spending. And more sitting around at home, more reading, chatting and drinking. Doing less is cheap and easy and it’s kind to the environment. The era which privileged the busy high achiever is coming to an end. That system has been found wanting, and there is a new world out there, a world of more fun, more freedom, more time for reflection and contemplation, community and cooking, making and mending. John Calvin - you have so much to answer for.'

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

New Years This Time Around, Fireworks, Finances and Forests

Fireworks

Welcome to 2009, the year that promises not to be 2008. That’s good enough for me. At the very least, we’ll see a president who won’t make me feel ashamed in front of foreign visitors. I fear history will sum up our nation’s last eight years with the image of a flying shoe.

We celebrated New Years at our neighbor’s place with a couple of mutual friends. We ate some party sandwich type hors d’oeuvres, drank a few too many Champaign cocktails, and, in the local tradition brought from the southeast, did fireworks. The fireworks you can buy here sit on the ground and shoot out sparks and whistle. We placed them on a ladder, since looking down at fireworks just doesn’t feel right. Anyway, here’s what you missed.





Our neighbor is a pyromaniac, so she always buys a ton of fireworks in June, in the couple of weeks when youth organizations are allowed to sell fireworks in parking lots (obviously, what could make more sense in a state that doesn’t see rain between May and November). I will never understand California laws. Never. I digress.

When one of the biggest fireworks (these big things cost $30 or more each) failed to ignite after the fuse burned down and fizzled, that wasn’t going to stop the show. Why not rip open the top, stick in the lighter, and light something in there that looks like a fuse?



Finances

We did our annual year end accounting of financial assets. Thanks to the magic of the internets, you can actually get that done on the morning of New Years day. We saw only a modest (at least relative to current conditions) percentage decrease in assets. This is one of those times when having only slightly more risk tolerance than Casper Milquetoast and the positive outlook of a hair shirt wearing millenialist pays off. Who knows what next year will bring?

Forests

After lunch today, we went for a walk in the Effie Yeaw Nature Center, which is a cool little riverside forest a couple of miles from our place. The nature center is part of Ancil Hoffman Park, whose history is associated with Max Bear Sr. in this somewhat convoluted way. In addition to being an elected county supervisor, Hoffman was Max Baer’s manager. Go Figure. Apparently the relationship was very good for Baer, Hoffman, boxing and the local community. I took the opportunity to use the new camera to annoy the local fauna.



Now I need to work on taking more flattering pictures of humans.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.