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Monday, December 28, 2009

I Was A Science Fiction Cliche - The Stolen Soul Trope

I finally got around to reading the December 2009 issue of The Magazine of Fantasy & Science Fiction.



Readers, you should have warned my that this pulp publication has stolen my identity, and possible my soul, if those soul things exist.

They stole my person hood, ran it through an auto - style chop shop, and handed out the pieces to December's authors. I can't decide whether I felt violated or secretly pleased as I read the secrets of my soul exposed to the world.


Paranoid, you say, paranoid? I say it ain't paranoid if they're really after you. I caught them red-handed, holding the stolen goods:

Starting on Page 81, "Hell of a Fix", by Matthew Hughes features an unenthusiastic actuary who refuses to sign a contract with the devil.

So what , you say, "There are plenty of actuaries who have no truck with The Evil One". I agree, but read on. . .

The major character in "I Needs Must Part, the Policeman Said", by Richard Bowes (starting on page 225) combines tumor removal surgery with unusual results and an obsession with John Dowland .

Bowes story presents a fig leaf defense that his story is really a tribute to Philip K Dick (Cry My Tears, the Policeman Said).

Bowes' weak excuse concerns me doubly:

(1) Bowes' convoluted cover story is surely evidence of the depth and complexity of this plot against the most important person in the universe (that's me, not you, BTW).

(2) It is not comforting to realize that the secrets of my soul can be so easily tweaked to look like a Philip K Dick novel. I'm not sure exactly what to think of this.

Darnit, I'm not crazy! They really have stolen my soul.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

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I must enjoy shouting into a vacuum, but I think about getting my act together one of these days. My mom says I am very handsome and intelligent.

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