Be Scared, Be Very Scared

First, President Obama brings back military tribunals, then this:


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This scares the living daylights out of me.

And if that's not scary enough, I had a telephone interview with headhunter this morning.I suspect nothing material Will come of this, since I don't think she has anything clients that need me. She was "just fishing", which is fine. Events like this make it harder for me to consistently avoid thinking about "What The Heck Am I Doing With My Life?". I left my last period of full time employment with the hope that I would do something cool and rewarding. That really hasn't happened,I catch myself killing some time during the weekdays.

However, in addition to working out several times each week, I spend more time doing things musical and I spend a few hours a week getting a leisurely paced self - education in Abstract Algebra. That is a strange and difficult subject which I don't understand well enough to even define what the subject is about in plain English. That's where the "Abstract"comes in. I skip all the harder problems, so the knowledge I'm getting is pretty sketchy. I can now pretty simply prove to High School students that there is no "largest" prime number. Talk about getting your geek on!

This is probably not a bad time for supportable semi-loafing, since everything in this economy feels like it wants to go from bad to worse. This region is pretty likely too see large layoffs in State Government, which will lead to more foreclosures and so on and so forth, blah, blah,blah. It won't take too many more empty store fronts and "For Sale" signs for Sacramento to start feeling like New Detroit. On the positive side, my lifestyle is becoming more popular, as more folks are introduced to the charms of bottom feeding slackerhood. I have been seeing more people than usual on the American River Bike Trail on weekday morning rides. Maybe, if people can figure out how to get along with out that shiny new big screen TV and IPhone, this mess we're in will produce a happiness dividend.

OMG, GLOBAL WARMING!

Some of my grumpiness might be related to the weather. We are at the start of our first heat blast of the year, expecting temperatures topping out a little above 100 degrees F Sunday and Monday. Average temperatures for this time of year are in the low 80's, so this is a bummer. Nothing produces lassitude like triple-digit temperatures. thankfully, the forecast is still predicting cool nights. This is one way to test the air conditioning. Hopefully temperatures will work their way back to normal for the rest of May.

Since I can't think of anything else to complain about,

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

They'll Pry My Cheerios From My Cold Dead Hands

The FDA today has today sent a Warning Letter to General Mills claiming the labeling of Cheerios is in violation of Federal law. The FDA takes offence to claims of lowered cholesterol.

Although several respected media outlets have reported this, I only found one mainstream media report (Wall Street Journal's blog) that actually appears to have read the two page warning letter. That's really a shame,since this letter is a doozy. I tend to agree wiht the position the FDA is taking, but it seems strange anyway.

In the broadest sense, the FDA's compaint is that the claims made on the box of Cheerios make Cheerios a drug. The FDA made this call because,

"Cheerios® Toasted Whole Grain Oat Cereal is promoted for conditions that cause it to be a drug because the product is intended for use in the prevention, mitigation, and treatment of disease. Specifically, your Cheerios® product bears the following claims ort its label:

• "you can Lower Your Cholesterol 4% in 6 weeks" "
• "Did you know that in just 6 weeks Cheerios can reduce bad cholesterol by an average of 4 percent? Cheerios is ... clinically proven to lower cholesterol. A clinical study showed that eating two 1 1/2 cup servings daily of Cheerios cereal reduced bad cholesterol when eaten as part of a diet low in saturated fat and cholesterol."

Now comes the fun stuff:

Since Cheerios labeling has made the stuff a drug, the fun starts now:

"The product is also a new drug under section 201(p) of the Act [21 U.S.C. § 321(p)] because it is not generally recognized as safe and effective for use in preventing or treating hypercholesterolemia or coronary heart disease. Therefore,under section 505(a) of the Act [21 U.S.C. § 355(a)], it may not be legally marketed with the above claims in the United States without an approved new drug application."

Yep, Cheerios as currently labeled is subhect to the FDA's drug approval process.

Now, here's where the hoarding comes in:

"Failure to promptly correct the violations specified above may result in enforcement action without further notice. Enforcement action may include seizure of violative products and/or injunction against the manufacturers and distributors of violative products."

First go after my breakfast, next thing you know, they'll take my gun! I guess maybe those cranial anal inserted reactionaries was right all the time! Perhaps not.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Liberatarian Vacation

Welcome to the Government intervention - free paradise. Don't forget to write.



That's my (Ok, really someone else's) story, but I guess I'll stick to it anyway.

Star Trek Movie Early Returns are K'Plah!!

Rotten Tomato's tomatometer gave Star Trek a 94% rating! K'plah!!

However,some critics accuse the movie of being a bit ''plastic''. I can't imagine why!

Some of the citizen critiques:

A movie that, against all odds, has miraculously resurrected a wheezing but beloved franchise.

Take note, George Lucas: This is how it's done.

A movie that, against all odds, has miraculously resurrected a wheezing but beloved franchise.

And now for one cormudgeonly critique (that'll probably match my impression, once I get around to seeing this):

The Gene Roddenberry years, when stories might play with questions of science, ideals or philosophy, have been replaced by stories reduced to loud and colorful action.

I'm so excited, I think I'll perspire and get a nosebleed!

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

Aliens Kidnapped the White House!

Well kids, now that the secret is out in Newsweek there's no reason for me not to talk.

Barak (rhymes with Spock, and almost rhymes with Tuvok) Obama is a Vulcan. Tricky of him to use the ''He's a Moslem'' straw man rumors to keep us all distracted form his extraterrestrial origins. I always thought his ears looked kind funny. Thanks to all the racists out there for helping the aliens' vile deception.

I quote from Newsweek:

''It's the Spock plot strands that give the new "Trek" its best shot at once again commanding the zeitgeist. Spock's cool, analytical nature feels more fascinating and topical than ever now that we've put a sort of Vulcan in the White House. All through the election campaign, columnists compared President Obama's unflappably logical demeanor and prominent ears with Mr. Spock's. But as Spock's complicated racial backstory is spun out in detail in the new "Trek"—right back into childhood—the Obama parallels keep deepening. Like Obama, Spock is the product of a mixed marriage (actually, an interstellar mixed marriage), and he suffers blunt manifestations of prejudice as a result. As played by Zachary Quinto, the young Spock loves his human mother, but longs to assimilate completely into his Vulcan father Sarek's ways, eschewing messy emotions the way all Vulcans do. Young Spock is constantly being told by Vulcans and humans alike that he's either seething with inappropriate emotions—indeed, he takes Kirk by the throat at one point—or that he's not emotional enough and shouldn't be so repressed. Obama may or may not be a fan—the White House says he isn't, but Trekkies have claimed him as one of their breed ever since he said, "I grew up on 'Star Trek'—I believe in the final frontier," at a campaign stop last year. If he does check out the new movie, I can imagine he might feel a special empathy for Spock's position, given the chattering class's insistence that he needs to show more emotion, too.''

It's amazing what passes for journalism these days,ainahey.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

One More Star Trek Related Post

There's a dork in the room, but no one else is here, just me and the kitties.


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Remember, it takes on to know one.

Thet's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Star Trek Update - Wesley Wheaton Sais Awesome!

Wil Wesley Crusher Wheaton is the guy on the right. Is he reacting to the quality of the film, or to the fact that someone still thinks he matters enough in the industry to invite him to a private screening of anything?

We now know Star Trek The Movie is popular with guys in their late 30s who still play Dungeons and Dragons. All I can say is K'Plah!!



That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Happy Belated Jeddi Day & What About Star Trek?

A belated happy Jedi Day to all Hangininsac's readers.

Jedi Day?, you may be asking yourself. Jedi Day comes each May, when those of us who are aware greet all others with, "May The Forth Be With You".

Now,what about Star Trek? The first average Trekkie reviews have come in, and I think my reaction to the movie is best summed up in the Onion News Network Reporters' observation:

"Some trekkies have said this movie sullies the vision of Gene Roddenberry, the hack that created the Star Trek show back in the forties or something."



Trekkies Bash New Star Trek Film As 'Fun, Watchable'

Remember, you read about it here first.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it, until someone brings back Abraham Lincoln in space, dammit!

No Smokee?, Get Tickee, You Fired!

Moa sez, "smoke more cigarettes, the revolution depends on it. Non-smoking counter-revolutionaries will be dealt with severely."


Well, now I've seen it all. Only a workers socialist paradise sponsored by an unregulated oligopoly (or visa versa, who the hell knows what those inscrutable nuts are up to now?) could come up with something as bassackwards as a policy to force public employees to smoke more. At first I thought this was a hoax, but even the moa-ist red kommie kontrolled Shanghai Daily admits this policy designed by the Keystone Kopps of economic development policy:

"The law orders all local government departments, organizations, service centers and corporations to consume at least 23,000 cartons of cigarettes this year - 400 cartons for most departments and corporations and 140 cartons for each school."

140 CARTONS FOR EACH SCHOOL? C'mon, even the most godless of commies wouldn't force innocent youth and their dedicated teachers to smoke their high tar kommunist Kancer sticks? That must be a typo, right? Next thing you know, they'll put poison in their peoples' baby formula. Inconceivable!

Yes Virginia, Chinese Communists are forcing their teachers to smoke and distribute cigarettes. In their own party controlled pink paper, they say,

"A monthly work plan has to be produced by each organization listing the consumption rate and the government will check these figures. Departments failing to make the quota will have their budgets cut, according to the government. Organizations not using government-approved cigarettes will be fined 1,000 yuan. Zhangtiansi Middle School has already found itself in trouble."

For comparison, a typical teacher's monthly pay is about 140 yuan.

Never forget,"First Rule ... Don't talk to commies"

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

We've Got Kitties!!!

Chapter One: In which the cats formerly known as Spanky and Sparky leave Happy Tails, find a new home, and reclaim their rightful names.



Although we've only had the cats here for a couple of days,they are really coming along well. Both cats are exploring and playing in the two rooms we've opened to them so far. Everybody is eating, using the box, and acting like kittens.

The cats requested we rename them Arthur and Elaine, in recognition of their regal status in the household. We acquiesced, of course.

Arthur is already occasionally jumping in our laps for purrs and pets, and Elaine is quickly getting bolder every hour she's here. She once nearly made it up to my lap, but the telephone rang, sending her into a panic. It won't be long before we allow them access to the rest of the house.

Arthur and Elaine were feral cats when they were trapped last January. Happy Tails neutered them, brought them to tip top health, and housed them with a volunteer foster home. The foster parents did a great job of working with the cats to build the social skills needed to live indoors with their human companions. Three cheers for happy Tails! I am thinking about volunteering there.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Steve Sherman

We Get The Farmers Markets We Deserve

I've been participating in a discussion on the Simple Living Network about misers' disappointments with their local farmers markets. The major grumpus is that in their communities,the farmers markets have become more chic boutique shopping experiences than a frugal alternative way for urbanites to get their food. From what I have seen in the Sacramento and surrounding suburban and partly rural region,I think that the nature of each farmers market reflects the local demand.

Comparing the farmers markets in Sacramento and Davis tells me a lot about the two communities.

Sacramento's market is a drab monument to pragmatism.

Here in Sacramento, I get unbelievably nice regular vegetables and fruit for about 1/2 the price I'd get at the non-organic grocery chains, and of course, eleventy zillion times the quality. Most of the produce is not organic, BTW, but organic is usually available. This is a very practical farmers market. The biggest market in Sacramento is in the least glamorous spot imaginable, a large parking area under a freeway overpass. Not much to look at, but great cheap fruit, vegetables fish and flowers. This video shows that this is serious grocery shopping. Get a look at the variety! Sorry to admit that from looking at the shoppers, you can see this certainly is not a fashionable market. I suspect the farmers are able to move enough volume to make the day at the market worth their effort. Look at the size of the trucks in the background as well as the number of shoppers schlepping huge quantities of produce and fresh fish. For the broth inclined, you can get buckets of fish heads for about $2 per pound. I have never had the guts to try this.

Davis's market attempts to provide an exclusive luxury shopping experience.

The somewhat more posh and exclusive social-climbing town of Davis (although exactly whom they are snubbing has been a local mystery for generations), about 30 miles from Sacramento has a market more targeted towards what I like to call "the too too crowd". The U C Davis websight emphasizes how it is all about the experience and making us better people, just by shopping in a cooler venue.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

My Business School Kicks Wharton's Butt!!!!!!

Thus Spake Daniel Gross, Newsweek's Financial columnist! He really said it.

Yes, I really did graduate from the University of Wisconsin School of Business, with a Master of Science Degree. I thought, and still think I am far to cool to be just another MBA. I was even designated as one of ten "Graduate Honor Students", which in the business schools of the early 1980s is like being honored as the tallest Munchkin on the block.

Here's Gross's assessment:

"Madison struck me as blessedly detached from the ailing financial sector. Of course, Wisconsin is suffering along with the rest of the nation. Its unemployment rate in March was 8.5 percent. But Madison, with its three-legged economic stool of education, state government, and health care, is faring somewhat better. More significantly, the business school isn't having a dark night of the soul, as so many of its Eastern counterparts are."

The difference is that this school always stayed the course of supporting Wisconsin's business. They never lost the university - wide vision that we call The Wisconsin Idea. The Wisconsin Idea is embraced by the University of Wisconsin System. The Idea dates back to Charles Van Hise, who stated that the boundaries of the university should be the boundaries of the state, and that research conducted at the University of Wisconsin System should be applied to solve problems and improve health, quality of life, the environment and agriculture for all citizens of the state. It's a far nobler fate than training futures traders for Lehman Brothers, IMHO.

Let those posh whinging Wharton losers keep crying in their mumsys' and daddykins' laps. We are back to a place and time where right thinking and right action produces right results.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Modern Finance Explained

It's hard to understand about the strange financial instruments that that have caused the financial meltdown that, after our collective trillion dollar handwringings, we still can't see clearly.

One piece of the picture is the the pseudoscience known as Financial Engineering. It was the unique application of Financial Engineering genius that allowed banks to be 100% sure that the varied and sundry mortgaged - base securities they hold are sound.

How did these folks develop so many unpalatable securities and convince financial institutions to gorge on the things?

Well, like most problems in life, you can find the answer inside a cow. This article in the New York Times exposes a line of thinking in the meat industry that is a clear and understandable analogue for Financial Enginering.

In a nutshell:

Cut it up in a different way, and pretend you have created something different.

Derivatives, CDOs and CDSs, it's what's for dinner. Yesterday,It was a chuck roast.


That's my story and I'm sticking to it

Madre De Dios!!!! It's a Grilled Cheese Miracle!

Guess who stopped by for lunch?

I am now a true believer! I thought it couldn't happen here. I stand corrected.

Ave marie, gratin plena!

This heavenly apparition happened right here in my kitchen. Honest. This is an actual photo. It has not been retouched, and it was delicious. Holy Communion has never been so cheesetastic.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it, like an overcooked grilled cheese sandwich on a posh LeCreuset pan.

Another Liberal Media Conspiracy is Afoot!

How come this vital news story has been supressed by those Ivy League cheese toast disdaining big city elitist Trilateral Commissioners?

Yes Jesus has once again made his appearence in the form of a toasted bread and cheese based snack. Actually,this has made me want to make grilled cheese sandwich for lunch. I will report if any miracles happen. Personally, I am hoping for an Obama apparition.


My favorite quote from the Chosen Person known to us as Linda Lowe:

'"I know there's a lot of people who believe there's some divine reason for it being there," said Lowe, who lives on Lake Bowen. "I just don't know, but I could never eat it."

Sorry about that, Catholics, but apparently eating God is a no - no.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Telemarketing Counter-terrorism

I tried a new approach with a telemarketing call yesterday. It worked pretty well.

What follows is the actual transcript of the call,which took about 30 seconds and made me laugh. I felt like Bob Newhart doing one of his telephone stand up routines. But seriously, I thought I was being rational.

Phone Rings:

Me: Hello.

Telemarketer: Hello, is Steve here?(with boiler room noise in background)

Me: Yes,to whom am I speaking?

Jeff: Jeff.

Me: Do I know you?

Jeff: No.

Me: Why should I talk to you?

Jeff: I don't know.

Me: I don't know either, bye bye.

I swear this is exactly what we said. I expected him to at least respond that he could give me a better interest rate or something or other. Strange.

I guess Jeff didn't have a script for my response.That saved me the rudeness of hanging up in the middle of a droning script, and gave me a chuckle as well. I think K had a laugh,too.

You can read more about this in the Simple Living Network Discussion Boards. Note, registration is required.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

UPSP WTF?

This is not a test. I repeat,this is not a test. The U S Postal service has issued a series of first class stamps featuring The Simpsons. Note the 44 cent cost to come into play when first class postage increases this May.

But, hey don't worry about any rate increases, 'cause you can vote for your favorite Simpson, right on the post office website!

I really don't know exactly what to say about this. As a kid, I occasionally looked at my dad's stamp collection and I even collected a few stamps myself. I thought one of the reasons people collect postage stamps is that stamps tell us something about the nations that produce them. 'Nuff said.

I voted for Lisa as my favorite Simpson. And those latte-drinking beret-wearing meditating say that American Democracy is dead. I say,"Give me the right to vote for Lisa Simpson on a postage stamp, or give me death by modified mortgage".

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

There is Hope for the Future

Yes, there is hope for the future. This clip from the new Star Trek movie actually made me laugh. The clip shows what happens when Kirk meets McCoy. I think Kirk sucks, but I have to admit I like the new Dr McCoy.

Alas, our hope is not a great hope. To borrow from the literary brilliance of Homer Simpson, Kirk sucks more than any suck has sucked before. Watch this video syrup of ipecac,if you dare.

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it, because I ain't no two faced Andorian.

Rancho Seco Proves a Dead Nuke is a Good Nuke

I have always wanted to explore some undeveloped land in the southern end of Sacramento County, near the Consumnes River . So, we decided to go out yesterday on a walk sponsored by the Sacramento Walking Sticks. They sponsored a roughly 10K self-paced hike through both the Rancho Seco Recreational Area, which is owned by the SMUD, the local public power utility, and the Nature Conservancy's adjacent Howard Ranch property. It was beautiful, and we are still in our short wildflower season, before everything turns brown in May. The walk started near the man made lake, and went on for most of its duration through beautiful rolling prairie that formed a beautiful Monetesque foreground for Rancho Seco's long idle cooling towers. This picture doesn't do justice to the true of this prarie, but it can give you an idea.


The wildflowers were beautiful!



It was strange that this land was completely free of California poppy (Eschscholzia californica).

And, as an extra attraction the ranch had several. . . Vernal Pools!!!.


Lots of people were fishing in the lake,which I found interesting because the lake's original purpose was to be part of a Nuclear power plant's cooling system. I wonder if anyone caught anything like Blinky, the three - eyed fish. Actually, this nuclear power plant's story is pretty interesting. The power plant was decommissioned because it rarely worked well enough to produce electricity, and suffered one major screw up that came close to creating a meltdown, according to the Nuclear Regulatory Commission. I did a little investigation, and I think I found the cause of the mishap. . .


The guys in the black suits claimed the other guy was filling in for Homer Simpson that day.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

All this and Flying Baby Excreta Too

My neighbor, recently returned from Nepal, lent me this air sickness bag from Yeti Airlines.


Cool illustration. But don't stop there, take a closer look at the instructions.


Two comments;

(1) I imagine most airlines are a little less permissive about "throwing baby's excreta in the flight period". In the spirit of the Hitch Hiker's Guide, I strongly recommend a towel when traveling on Yeti Airlines. You never know when you'll be too slow to duck.

(2) I think "throwing the wrappers of chocolate" is a uniquely polite and creative way to speak of barfing. Tossing one's cookies is so twentieth century. I imagine that at fraternity parties we will soon hear, "Dude, open the window, I'm about to be throwing the wrappers of chocolate".

Yes, Nepal really does have a Yeti Airlines . They are very proud to now be able to say, "we now have the largest fleet of ten aircrafts". Who wouldn't be?

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.